Observant little ...

I don't understand the answer, but I may have some ideas on the question...

Platonic dating

This Fish posted about a concept she called "Girl Dating". I was trying to explain the concept to someone last night and having great difficulty. I think he was thinking that I'd turned into a closet (or not so closet) lesbian. Until I changed the terminology to "platonic dating".

Think about it, platonic dating - in particular, "the purpose of a date is for the people dating to get to know each other and decide whether they want to have a relationship".

But when you think about it, what is the difference between real dating and platonic dating. Really, it's just the nature of the relationship isn't it? For platonic dating, if you enjoy each others company enough, the end result is a friendship. For real dating, if you enjoy each others company enough, the end result is (or is supposed to be) that you become lovers.

For both types, you are there to find out how much you like each other. You might know each other through friends, work, or just met down the pub when you were both smashed on Saturday night. But the purpose is the same. And the mechanics are very similar - you are on your best behaviour, you for for drinks or coffee or a meal, you flirt a little and smile a lot (as This Fish said, girls do flirt with each other, it's just in a different way), you split the bill. And if it all works out, you make arrangements to see each other again.

I've always said that the definition of "dating" is going out one-on-one where there is the possibility of sexual contact at the end of the night, without it being a given (ie where you go out one-on-one with someone you are already in a sexual relationship with). But I like the definition above better - it makes allowance for all those other types of dating as well.

And, now that I've thought about this more, maybe I'll be able to describe platonic dating better next time I'm blurting out my opinions.

Listening to: JJJ Mixtape - Faithless


Blogger sarni said...

I know exactly what you mean! I had one of these earlier this year with a girl who was dating one of my male friends... I'm not sure about the flirting bit (though I think I have a different definition of that), but the rest of it certainly rings a bell. :-)

1:36 am  
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